WHITE KIDS-MY FAVORITE NEGRO

THINGS THAT ARE FUCKED UP  

We have a collection of subjects which I have entitled-Minority Report-for no particular reason other than 'I can'. This will undoubtedly piss a lot of people off, which is my intention. After all this is a world where freedom of speech and expression is nurtured, unless your a fucking white-ass cracker. But many will enjoy this mirth-filled romp into insensitive racial shit. My prof told me that he wished he was at times either a kike, wet-back or coon, than he could say whatever the fuck he wanted to without getting censured by the University. He was found in a dumpster about 2 weeks after making this statement.


MY FAVORITE NEGRO 

Recently, Miss Templeton, a teacher in Fairfax County, Va. asked her Grade 3 class to write an essay on who their favorite Negro was. Being the richest county in the entire USA, many of these kids have never even seen a black person. Here are some of the papers handed in.

REGINALD FORBES III-My favorite Negro or Afro-American, that's what my dad calls them when we have diplomats over, otherwise he calls them coons or porch-monkeys, is Mike Tyson. He combined the artistry of boxing and cannibalism into one MMA. He made over $300 million, almost as much as my dad made in bonuses from the bank he is president of, even though they have 'tanked' 3 times in the last 5 years. It is too bad Mr. Tyson lost all his money when he got the funny looking Negro, Don King to be the manager. One time when my parents were out, I turned the TV to BET to watch Mike and he said Don King was a nigger and Uncle Tom. I sort of know what a nigger is, it is a nasty word for a Negro, but he sure doesn't look like my Uncle Tom! I was sad when Mike went to prison for accidentally raping that woman.

THOMAS WENTWORTH-KILLANE IV-My favorite Negro is Don King, although my friend Reginald doesn't like him. My dad says he is a financial & criminal genius, even though he has the intelligence of a baboon. I find it amazing that he actually killed 2 guys, one he shot in the back, the other he stomped to death and only did 4 years in prison. I read in Forbes, Don has robbed more people of their hard earned money than any ten bankers put together. My next door neighbor Chief Justice Roberts, told my dad that the reason he hasn't gone to jail any longer than he has, is because he only victimizes fellow Negros, mostly boxers. They both laughed their heads off after he said that. His hair looks really funny. My brothers hair looked like that once when he peed the bed and he had an electric blanket on him to keep him warm.

CLARISSA BEVERLY STANTON-MILHOUSE-My favorite Negro is Robert Mugabe. I think this because of what he has succeeded in doing. My great-grandfather once lived in Rhodesia. He told us stories about how it was one of the richest countries in Africa. It was self-sufficient, had prosperous farms and mines and agriculture. All the people were as happy as any African can be expected to be. They had no tribal warfare. In a matter of mere decades, Mr. Mugabe has worked extremely hard to totally destroy the country. They have no food, no farms, suffer from hyperinflation, hard currency shortage, the highest HIV and rapes per capita. The disease rate is probably high because in 1996, doctors and nurses went on strike. Instead of giving them a raise, he killed them. Can you imagine how hard you have to work to actually go out and completely destroy an entire country!

Well, fuck me, I decided that this is it for today's blog. I was going to get into all kinds of shit, like ERA, PC, hate crimes, those dip-shit, dumb-fucks at CNN but I think I have created enough of a shit storm for one day. Next week, some kids from Howard County, Md. have sent me their essays on "My Favorite Hebrew", so see ya next time. Doc